Parenting must be intentional, not coincidental. Maria Hamilton joins the show for this discussion.

Transcribed with OpenAI Whisper (base.en). Timestamps are approximate. Lightly cleaned for readability; quotations from on-air callers may include filler words. Use the audio player above for the authoritative recording.

1. 0:00Darkness is not an affirmative force.
2. 0:03It simply reoccupies the space vacated by the light.
3. 0:07This is the Hamilton Corner on American Family Radio.
4. 0:11It should be uncomfortable for a believer to live as a hypocrite.
5. 0:15Delivery people out of the bondage of mainstream media.
6. 0:18And the philosophies of this world.
7. 0:20God has called you and me to be his ambassador.
8. 0:24Even in this dark moment.
9. 0:26Let's not miss our moment.
10. 0:28And now, the Hamilton Corner.
11. 0:33Good evening, everybody.
12. 0:35Welcome to the Hamilton Corner.
13. 0:36My name is Abraham Hamilton.
14. 0:37A third, I am the host of the program
15. 0:40joined by producer extraordinaire, often imitated.
16. 0:43Never duplicated the real J. Mac, ladies and gentlemen.
17. 0:47Now, I've said it before, you know, J. Mac is quite a dapper guy.
18. 0:50You see him.
19. 0:51Be careful.
20. 0:52You might get cut because he's so sharp.
21. 0:56We ready to rock and roll with today's program.
22. 0:58one of the major things that's been on my heart is following the conversation we had earlier this week about the study that was released by the American Academy of Pediatrics is a reality.
23. 1:15Look, they're tempting Jeff with all kind of morsels of consumption.
24. 1:20Don't succumb to it, Jeff.
25. 1:21Stay strong.
26. 1:22Stay strong.
27. 1:26But the thing that's been on my heart this week is the reality of our need to parent intentionally.
28. 1:35And I say that not as somebody who is a, I'm a detached expert and I have 45 years in
29. 1:42the field and I've written 17 books on the matter.
30. 1:47But my children have grown and gone.
31. 1:49No, I say this as a co-baligerent.
32. 1:52I'm a parent right alongside you all as I'm making a statement.
33. 1:56And I don't even know if I told you.
34. 1:58I think I did tell Jeff a man.
35. 1:59Not only do I have new two teenagers in my house,
36. 2:02but now I got a 15-year-old.
37. 2:06Man, the boy is driving, man.
38. 2:08And learning to drive is the permit
39. 2:13is the, was on that the learner's permit is what was on deck.
40. 2:16I've been teaching them how to drive.
41. 2:19And that time just flies by man,
42. 2:21but we have to be, we need to be intentional.
43. 2:23So we want to talk a little bit about what the scripture says
44. 2:26in that regard.
45. 2:27At this very moment, many of you, if not most of you
46. 2:29are making your transition from your part time jobs
47. 2:32where you generate an income to your full time jobs
48. 2:35where you cultivate an outcome.
49. 2:36And as you do so, I want to remind you to do it.
50. 2:40Here's the word again, with intentionality.
51. 2:44recognizing the primacy that God places on family.
52. 2:46It is a simple truth that we will not be able
53. 2:52to outvote, out politic, out Supreme Court's opinion.
54. 3:00Frankly, out church deficiencies that abound in the home.
55. 3:06We must, we must, we must execute our King's commission
56. 3:10starting first in our homes, in our families,
57. 3:14Refuse to neglect the family.
58. 3:16Refuse to neglect the home.
59. 3:18Refuse to elevate other things as being far more important,
60. 3:22far more significant.
61. 3:24No, because what goes on in your house,
62. 3:27what goes on in my house is more important
63. 3:30than what's going on in the White House.
64. 3:32You know, you got the Trump accounts coming on,
65. 3:35you got the founder of Dell,
66. 3:38donating $6 billion, over $6 billion
67. 3:41to the Trump accounts for children born between 2020,
68. 3:44But 2025 and 2028, you can have all of the Trump account you want.
69. 3:51But if we're not making disciples, we're putting ourselves,
70. 3:54first and foremost, we're not obeying
71. 3:56with the Lord commands us in scripture.
72. 3:58And secondarily, we're putting ourselves continuously
73. 4:01on the trajectory for our nation to move away from
74. 4:05where we should be instead of moving toward it.
75. 4:08So as you're making your transitions,
76. 4:10be cognizant of that.
77. 4:12Don't allow your day to zap all that you are,
78. 4:16and then you only have the leftover remnants
79. 4:21from expending yourself elsewhere for your families.
80. 4:25But we have to prioritize our families,
81. 4:27not just in some form of mental hierarchy,
82. 4:31but in terms of presence and investment,
83. 4:33substantive investment to invest ourselves and our family,
84. 4:37to give ourselves to our family,
85. 4:40because it truly, truly is the first
86. 4:42foundational, I should say. When I say first, I mean it in that sense, the foundational
87. 4:46ministerial commitment. If we are believers in the Lord Jesus Christ, then
88. 4:52there is fruit that should be born in us and produced through us. The most
89. 4:56immediate beneficiaries of that fruit that is born in us and produced through us,
90. 5:01it must be our family members. We shouldn't step over our homes in order to be
91. 5:06effective in the surrounding world. But let us exalt the King of glory, starting
92. 5:11first and foremost in our homes and let us make disciples in our homes.
93. 5:15I know we have parents, we have grandparents, we have great grandparents who listen to this
94. 5:22program and we need all of you.
95. 5:25We need all of you to be a part of what God is calling us to.
96. 5:28All right.
97. 5:29To the word of God we go.
98. 5:30Romans 8, Romans 8, this entire week I've been talking about the significance of ascribing
99. 5:37God's word, the appropriate gravity it requires because it truly, truly is God's word.
100. 5:45And in Romans chapter eight, I want to remind you, this is the Apostle Paul writing a letter
101. 5:51to the Christians in Rome, all right, in the first century.
102. 5:55And in Romans chapter eight, we're going to focus on verses five through eight.
103. 5:59Romans chapter eight versus five through eight.
104. 6:02And this is what the scripture says.
105. 6:03those who are according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh.
106. 6:12But those who are according to the Spirit, the things of the Spirit, notice Spirit has
107. 6:18a capital S there, preferring to Holy Spirit, the third person in the triune Godhead.
108. 6:25Verse 6, for the mind set on the flesh is death, but the mind set on the Spirit is life
109. 6:34and peace because the mind set on the flesh is hostile toward God, for it does not subject
110. 6:44itself to the law of God, for it is not even able to do so. And those who are in the flesh
111. 6:50cannot please God. Now, this is one of the passages of scripture I remember as a young
112. 6:58man growing up, my pastor in the world, and she's always saying, we don't want to be
113. 7:03carnally minded. I want to be carnally minded. And the King James explains in verse 7, the
114. 7:10carnal mind is enmity against God, is enmity against God. But verse 7 is an explanatory saying
115. 7:18because of this reality, it is hostile towards God. What is being explained? Verse 6 is what
116. 7:24is being explained. Verse 6 says, for the mind set on the flesh, or to say differently,
117. 7:29The carnal mind is death.
118. 7:33The carnal mind is death.
119. 7:39Let's just pause for a moment and reflect on this.
120. 7:42The inspired Word of God, authored by the Spirit of God, pinned by God's Apostle Paul,
121. 7:49is explaining that carnal mindedness to maintain a carnal mind is death.
122. 7:59It's not just a lesser life choice.
123. 8:02It's not just, you know, there are many ways you can pursue, no, no.
124. 8:06The scripture is telling us, telling us the carnal mind is death.
125. 8:10Well, why is that?
126. 8:11You don't have to ask for my opinion.
127. 8:13Verse 7 tells us why.
128. 8:14The carnal mind is death.
129. 8:15Why?
130. 8:16Because it is hostile toward God.
131. 8:20Because it is against God.
132. 8:22Because the carnal mind is enmity against God.
133. 8:25That is why it's hostile.
134. 8:27I'm sorry.
135. 8:28is why it is death because the carnal mind is hostile against God. That is why it is death.
136. 8:36But you know what's sad? We have many professing believers who either one do not know that the
137. 8:43scripture says, hey, by the way, the carnal mind is death. But secondarily, there are some
138. 8:48who don't believe it. There are some who are comfortable being carnally minded. And we have
139. 8:57to always remember that frequency of occurrence does not establish or define normality for a believer.
140. 9:09Because something is a frequent occurrence or because something is popular, it does not normalize
141. 9:16that for the believer. What should be normalized for the believer is what the scripture teaches.
142. 9:23Carnal-mindedness is death. Why is it death? Because it is hostile. It is against. It is
143. 9:34enmity against God. That's why it's death. God is life. God is the source of all life.
144. 9:43Eternal life doesn't just transpire when our physical bodies transition. No eternal life
145. 9:48begins in the here and now. John 17 explains it. To know the true and living God and his
146. 9:53the Son Jesus Christ is eternal life.
147. 9:56That begins on this side of eternity.
148. 9:59But carnal-mindedness is death.
149. 10:03Now why am I saying that?
150. 10:05This is the same Apostle Paul who writes in this
151. 10:07the same epistle,
152. 10:08being guided by the Spirit of God,
153. 10:11who explains to the believer,
154. 10:12this is why believer,
155. 10:14we must not be conformed to this world,
156. 10:19but be transformed by what the renewing of our minds.
157. 10:24God knows who we are when we are, what we are,
158. 10:26where we are when he saves us.
159. 10:27But it doesn't save us to keep us where we are,
160. 10:30where we are, in the ways that we were when he saved us.
161. 10:33He saved us and he gives us the blessed privilege
162. 10:35of being sanctified, being transformed,
163. 10:41so that what I was is being renewed day by day.
164. 10:47But the unfortunate reality is that
165. 10:48carnal minding this manifests itself
166. 10:50in all kinds of ways.
167. 10:53Sometimes you have men who go into marriage
168. 10:55with a carnal mind concerning marriage.
169. 10:57Sometimes you have women who go into marriage with a carnal mind,
170. 11:01concerning marriage.
171. 11:02Sometimes we have people, we have families, we have husbands and wives who are parents,
172. 11:07but they parent in a carnal mind in manner.
173. 11:14Sometimes we have people who are, you know, it's described it this way,
174. 11:17who is not like acts too lazy that what must I do to be saved.
175. 11:20It is how much can I be like the world?
176. 11:23How worldly can I be and still maintain my fire insurance?
177. 11:31We need to be honest and welcome to spirit of God to inspect our hearts.
178. 11:35as to whether or not we have adopted carnal-mindedness.
179. 11:41The Romans 12 phenomenon,
180. 11:43do not be conformed to this world,
181. 11:44but be transformed by the renewal of your mind.
182. 11:48Then you will be able to discern the good,
183. 11:52acceptable, and perfect will of God.
184. 11:54What Romans 12 invites us to do, commands of us, frankly.
185. 11:58Not invites commands of us that we employ
186. 12:02the white hot light of scriptural scrutiny
187. 12:04to every aspect of our lives.
188. 12:08I'm a friend.
189. 12:09Am I a godly friend?
190. 12:12We were talking earlier this week about influencing you.
191. 12:15You know, he walks with the wise.
192. 12:17Am I a wise companion?
193. 12:22Is Jeff benefited by being, by knowing me,
194. 12:26by having a relationship with me?
195. 12:28Or am I a detriment to him?
196. 12:31Am I a source of godly influence?
197. 12:36Am I a source of godly encouragement?
198. 12:39Or am I an occasion to invite carnality to persist?
199. 12:47Because here's the not so secret secret.
200. 12:50The carnal mind is death.
201. 12:54The carnal mind is death.
202. 12:56It's not just a worse approach.
203. 12:59The carnal mind is not just, well, you know,
204. 13:01that's not the best way, but I understand
205. 13:04when you're coming from, no, the scripture says,
206. 13:05the carnal mind is death.
207. 13:06I read it again.
208. 13:08But those according to the flesh set their minds
209. 13:10on the things of the flesh.
210. 13:11But those who are according to the spirit,
211. 13:13the things of the Spirit, for the mindset on the flesh,
212. 13:17or the carnal mind is death,
213. 13:21but the mindset on the Spirit is life and peace.
214. 13:25Why? Verse seven tells us, because the carnal mind,
215. 13:29because the mindset on the flesh is hostile towards God,
216. 13:33the carnal mind is enmity against God,
217. 13:38for it does not subject itself to the law of God,
218. 13:40for it's not even able to do so.
219. 13:42and those who are in the flesh cannot please God.
220. 13:49Cannot please God.
221. 13:52I say on a regular basis that as the show comes on,
222. 13:56as the evening drive time show,
223. 13:58that you're transitioning to your full time job.
224. 14:02I say that in the effort to recalibrate
225. 14:04our thought processes concerning this.
226. 14:06I've said on the air before the number of times
227. 14:08where I've heard men tell me in particular and women,
228. 14:11but men particularly, I'm thinking of right now,
229. 14:13that man, hey, if I wish I understood this
230. 14:15when I was young.
231. 14:17is now I'm understanding it now, but now I don't have the opportunity to do what I would have
232. 14:24loved the opportunity to do. Guys, often what happens is these people don't
233. 14:28attend a dude and nobody says, hey, you know what, I want to get married, have children, and mess up.
234. 14:32Nobody does that. Nobody does that. But what happens is that there's often carnal mindsets
235. 14:39that we just placate, that we are hospitable toward and don't even recognize that it's carnality,
236. 14:45and that carnal mindset produces death in various iterations.
237. 14:50But God came that we might have life in that more abundantly.
238. 14:55Renewing the mind is intrinsic to discernment.
239. 14:59HGTV has changed over the years and not necessarily for the better.
240. 15:05The seemingly wholesome home and garden television has decided it would be clever and funny to
241. 15:10hint at an expletive in the title of one of its newest shows.
242. 15:14The alternative spelling is so poor that children can still read it and repeat it.
243. 15:19Obviously I won't say it here, but you can go to 1MillionMoms.com to find out more and
244. 15:24urge HGTV to rename the show, 1MillionMoms.com.
245. 15:35Shiting light into the darkness, this is the Hamilton Corner on American Family Radio.
246. 15:41Welcome back to the Hamilton Corner, Abraham Hamilton the 3rd here with you.
247. 15:46And I have in studio with me my favorite guest.
248. 15:48y'all already know who it is.
249. 15:49She does not require introduction.
250. 15:51It is none other than my lovely wife, Mrs.
251. 15:55I heard that again.
252. 15:56Everybody watching this show understand Mrs. Maria Hamilton.
253. 16:00Thank you for joining me on the program.
254. 16:02Thank you for having me again, babe.
255. 16:03You're very welcome.
256. 16:04So before you came in,
257. 16:05I was talking about Romans eight
258. 16:09and specifically verses five to eight
259. 16:11and explaining how the scripture talks
260. 16:14about the carnal mind is death.
261. 16:16And sometimes we can miss, not miss,
262. 16:23not recognize the different ways
263. 16:26that we might have embraced or might currently embrace
264. 16:30carnal mindedness, not recognizing certain things.
265. 16:34This week I shared a study that was just published
266. 16:37early this week, actually just published Monday
267. 16:39by the American Academy of Pediatrics
268. 16:41titled Smartphone Ownership, Age of Smartphone Acquisition
269. 16:45and the health outcomes in early adolescence
270. 16:48where the bottom line of the study was,
271. 16:51if you give children before the age of 12,
272. 16:56what they call smartphones, which I've explained
273. 16:58extensively this week, they're not phones,
274. 17:00they're computers, they're high capacity computers
275. 17:07that keep the children plugged into the world,
276. 17:09what they result, the study show,
277. 17:11not just in opinion, the study shows
278. 17:14greater problems with depression and obesity and all kinds of things.
279. 17:18And the reality is sometimes you have parents, nobody said, yeah,
280. 17:24you know what I want to make a decision to that could lead to my child being more
281. 17:27depressed. I'm going to make a decision for my soul, so my child can be obese.
282. 17:30Nobody does that. Nobody does that. But things occur and we don't often understand
283. 17:33why. And some of the parents of the children who were a part of the study said,
284. 17:37you know, well, we gave our children the devices because, you know,
285. 17:40all their friends had them.
286. 17:42And that pricked my heart because God has designed us
287. 17:46in such a way.
288. 17:47I mean, the world is going to world,
289. 17:49but we as believers, we have an obligation
290. 17:51to make sure that we submit the whole of who we are
291. 17:53and what we are engaged into the authority of Christ.
292. 17:56And the Lord's of Christ and the authority of His Holy Word
293. 17:59that includes parenting.
294. 18:00Yeah.
295. 18:02Parenting, vividly requires intentionality.
296. 18:07But we have many who think we'll get godly results
297. 18:10even though we don't have a godly intention,
298. 18:12let alone a godly mythology,
299. 18:16godly methodology of implementation.
300. 18:20What do you see, and what have you encountered
301. 18:23in terms of Christian couples, spouses, husbands,
302. 18:27and wives being unified in their vision
303. 18:31for the children that God has entrusted to their care?
304. 18:33Yeah, so if we're not intentional,
305. 18:35I mean, if we don't pray about what we want to see
306. 18:39and our children later in their lives,
307. 18:41where we are heading as a family unit,
308. 18:45what God has placed on our hearts,
309. 18:46not only missionally like doing, right?
310. 18:49Not only like, okay, maybe we're a missionary family
311. 18:51or maybe we are, you know, whatever,
312. 18:54in every other way that it can manifest itself.
313. 18:57But I'm talking more so in the sense of
314. 19:01raising a generation of believers
315. 19:04and passing down the faith.
316. 19:07So when we are not intentional about seeking God
317. 19:10for to help us how to apply that method, right?
318. 19:14Give a strategy and understanding
319. 19:16on how to do that day to day,
320. 19:19then we don't do it, and then when we don't do it,
321. 19:22then we just live and we shift to neutral.
322. 19:25So the shift into neutral really looks like
323. 19:27doing what everybody else is doing, right?
324. 19:29But it's so, it is such an antithesis to the scriptures,
325. 19:34to biblical Christianity,
326. 19:36because the Lord called us to be sons of light,
327. 19:38sons and daughters of light.
328. 19:40So we are supposed to be a peculiar people.
329. 19:42So we as fathers and mothers, right, as a couple, you and I,
330. 19:46we are called to be leaders in the faith.
331. 19:49Like we, as believers, every believer is called
332. 19:52to be a leader in the sense that we are the ones
333. 19:55that are ambassadors, we are advocating for the truth
334. 19:58in the way in what we say and how we live.
335. 20:00And so if we're not intentional
336. 20:02about how we are going to raise our children,
337. 20:06then they're going to be, right, they're gonna be influenced.
338. 20:09And if we're not the main influencers,
339. 20:11and I'm not talking about like some, you know,
340. 20:13nobody can say nothing in my child is only us,
341. 20:15no, I'm talking about if we have the heart
342. 20:17and the conviction and the intentionality
343. 20:19and the desire to honor God,
344. 20:21in the way that we train up our children,
345. 20:23the way we form them and then we raise them
346. 20:25and we influence them and we indoctrinate them
347. 20:28because we're teaching them doctrine, right?
348. 20:30If we are not intentional there, something else or someone else is going to infiltrate
349. 20:36their hearts and train them.
350. 20:38And so as Christian parents, we usually, not usually, we unfortunately too often shift to
351. 20:45neutral in our jobs really.
352. 20:50We got called us to influence our children.
353. 20:54And even you see it all throughout the Old Testament, right?
354. 20:56in Psalm 78.
355. 20:57And all throughout every account that God recorded
356. 21:00of his faithfulness to the people of God,
357. 21:02he said, tell your children.
358. 21:04Remember, remember, remember what I have done for you.
359. 21:07Not because he just thinks, oh, they just need to know
360. 21:11generally what it means to be an Israelite.
361. 21:13No, it is so they can know my character.
362. 21:15So they can know who I am.
363. 21:16God's faithfulness, God's character, was evident
364. 21:20in every account recorded for us in scripture.
365. 21:22And he said, tell the next generation,
366. 21:25pass down who I am to them.
367. 21:28And if we're not intentional in doing that,
368. 21:29then the world is gonna tell them.
369. 21:31The parents that say,
370. 21:32I'm gonna buy a cell phone, an iPhone or whatever,
371. 21:35to my child because the other kids have them,
372. 21:38they're being followers.
373. 21:39Like that's so like the anti-Christianity, right?
374. 21:43Who says that we are supposed to do what everybody else does?
375. 21:45That Bible actually says the opposite.
376. 21:47We are the ones that have the truth.
377. 21:49We lead with the truth.
378. 21:50What does the Bible say?
379. 21:52Children need.
380. 21:54Do they need to follow their peers?
381. 21:55Do they need to be like everybody else?
382. 21:57Or do they need to be set apart?
383. 21:58Or are we a holy nation, a royal priesthood?
384. 22:01Like what are we, how are we looking at this?
385. 22:04And first are we being intentional?
386. 22:06And then are we seeking the voice of God,
387. 22:09the leadership of the Holy Spirit,
388. 22:10to do what these calls to do with our kids?
389. 22:13So would you say, well, I know you,
390. 22:16so I know what you say.
391. 22:17So I can't even present that question
392. 22:19as if it's a hypothetical, because I know you.
393. 22:21isn't an extreme assertion for one to say,
394. 22:29that the primary purpose for which God allows
395. 22:31Christian families to have children
396. 22:33is so that the parents evangelize their own children
397. 22:38and invest in them in such a way
398. 22:41that by God, sovereign grace,
399. 22:42the result is that the child comes to know Jesus Christ
400. 22:46as their Lord and Savior personally.
401. 22:50They become Christians first,
402. 22:52and then secondarily that the child
403. 22:54dedicates the entirety of their lives
404. 22:57to serving God's purpose.
405. 22:58God is looking for Godly seed.
406. 23:01He's looking for a people after his heart,
407. 23:04a people that are going to be his hands and feet
408. 23:06on this earth and who advocate for the truth and advance it
409. 23:09and who obey him, you know, and honor him
410. 23:11and worship him.
411. 23:12That's what he's looking for and that's what he desires.
412. 23:14That's why that's why we as humans
413. 23:16are his greatest creation, if you will.
414. 23:19He could have done that with the animals,
415. 23:20but he did it with us.
416. 23:21He desires of people that know him intimately.
417. 23:24And so such were some of us, like we were once children
418. 23:27who were either raised to know Christ or were not, right?
419. 23:31And so now we're the adults.
420. 23:32Are we going to do what the previous generations
421. 23:34that have done or not done, right?
422. 23:37If they didn't do it like in our scenario,
423. 23:39or are we going to now say, okay,
424. 23:42we see clearly what the Lord desires.
425. 23:45Are we going to be the ones that not only pass
426. 23:47off a baton as if like, I've had it, I'm done with mine.
427. 23:50And here you go.
428. 23:52No, are we going to raise a generation of warriors
429. 23:54to stand shoulder to shoulder with us
430. 23:56to advance the gospel in this nation and in this world?
431. 23:59And so it is a great calling.
432. 24:01It is a great calling, which is why we say
433. 24:03it is not something that is small
434. 24:05to evangelize and make disciples of people.
435. 24:08Yes, we started our home if the Lord has called us
436. 24:12by allowing us to have children to be parents,
437. 24:16but also anybody that comes along
438. 24:18that the Lord desires that we pour into.
439. 24:20And so we don't, if we fail to do that,
440. 24:24we are weakening the body of Christ.
441. 24:26And we are seeing that generation to generation,
442. 24:28God is a generational God.
443. 24:30He wants a people for himself, young and old, you know?
444. 24:34We can in the body of Christ,
445. 24:35but also is disobedience by us.
446. 24:40And so again, I'm asking the question specifically,
447. 24:44because as I say, you're making a transition
448. 24:47from your part time job to your full time job
449. 24:48to do so with intentionality.
450. 24:51If the scripture explains that it is a primary function
451. 24:56of Christian parents to evangelize and make disciples
452. 25:00of our children, then the lack of that being the priority
453. 25:06for the parents is a feature of disobedience to God
454. 25:10and what he requires for children in the parent child
455. 25:14relationship.
456. 25:15And it shows that we've allowed other things to become
457. 25:19priority that are foreign to what the scripture says
458. 25:22And oftentimes our lives reflect what truly is priority
459. 25:27in times of monetary investment,
460. 25:28in times of time, investment,
461. 25:30in times of priority and heart, mind,
462. 25:32and thought life investment, but often reflects that.
463. 25:34Question number one,
464. 25:35do we understand what it means to make a disciple?
465. 25:38Like do we understand evangelism?
466. 25:40Do we understand discipleship?
467. 25:41Do we understand what God means when he says,
468. 25:45you know, share the gospel, reclaim it,
469. 25:47make disciples of all nations and baptize them?
470. 25:50Like do we understand what that truly all means
471. 25:52what it looks like practically to do that.
472. 25:54And yes, we can do that with people outside of our home,
473. 25:57but man, how horrible it is to do it outside of our home
474. 26:00and then neglect our own seed, our own offspring,
475. 26:03who then will grow up resenting the body of Christ,
476. 26:06resenting the church, abandon the faith.
477. 26:08And so we do we understand what discipleship means.
478. 26:11If we do understand what discipleship means,
479. 26:13we understand that everyone is going to be,
480. 26:18be become, if you will, like their teacher, right?
481. 26:22Like everybody is going to be a disciplined learner
482. 26:25of something.
483. 26:26That's not your opinion, Jesus said.
484. 26:27Right.
485. 26:28Christ said it.
486. 26:29This thing will fully train will be like his teacher.
487. 26:31That's right.
488. 26:31So you have this phenomenon amongst humanity
489. 26:35that got instituted that will happen.
490. 26:37So then who is going to, who is your child
491. 26:41going to be modeled after, if you will?
492. 26:43Is it going to be the YouTube influencers?
493. 26:45Is it going to be their peers at school?
494. 26:47Is it going to be society and culture as a whole,
495. 26:50or is it going to be Christ-likeness in them, right?
496. 26:53And that's why it's a full-time job.
497. 26:56So I think a lot of times in the church,
498. 26:59we fail to understand what discipleship is,
499. 27:00and also we fail to understand what it looks like,
500. 27:03practically daily, and why we are saying it takes so much time.
501. 27:07Yeah, now I wanna get to the practical daily thing,
502. 27:09but I wanna go back to the priority thing,
503. 27:11because you mentioned this, and I wanna have this conversation,
504. 27:14I wanna anchor the conversation to the truth of God's word.
505. 27:16And so what is priority in the parent child relationship?
506. 27:21You refer to the scripture, it's in Malachi 215.
507. 27:25When God is describing what he pursues, what is it that the one God sought in blessing mankind
508. 27:29with the privilege of the one flesh, the conjugal one flesh you and you between husband and wife?
509. 27:34Well the one God sought godly seed.
510. 27:36This is one portion of scripture where you have the all-encompassing, infinitely complete
511. 27:41in itself the God that has a seity that allows himself to be described in his word as seeking
512. 27:46something, as if he's pursuing something that doesn't exist presently.
513. 27:51He does that intentionally.
514. 27:52And he said he's seeking godly offspring.
515. 27:56He knows they're not godly upon conception.
516. 27:58He knows they're not godly upon delivery.
517. 28:01But he has the anticipation that parents will be invested there.
518. 28:06But practically speaking, many parents, including Christian parents in terms of life priority,
519. 28:14The truth is things are at the top, the top wrong,
520. 28:18if we can be honest, the top wrong is often,
521. 28:21well, we want them to go to Harvard.
522. 28:23Well, the top wrong is what we want them to enjoy
523. 28:25a wonderful social life.
524. 28:26Well, the top wrong is we want them to play travel ball.
525. 28:29To be happy.
526. 28:30We want them to be happy.
527. 28:31We want them to be popular.
528. 28:33We want them to have a good time when,
529. 28:35in terms of the practical investment,
530. 28:37and let me be clear, nobody's saying that,
531. 28:40evangelizing the type of your children,
532. 28:42me, they can't be happy, can't have a good time.
533. 28:43but what is priority.
534. 28:45This is what I'm saying.
535. 28:46And the way that it often unfolds is just like
536. 28:49the parents in the study say,
537. 28:50well, we gave our children smart phones
538. 28:52because everybody else had them.
539. 28:53If we don't have clarity in what should be
540. 28:57and must be priority in terms of what the scripture says,
541. 29:02we will inevitably miss the mark
542. 29:04because we have not aimed at a target.
543. 29:06It's like you said this before,
544. 29:08God uses the similarly, the children are like arrows
545. 29:11in the quiver of a mighty warrior.
546. 29:12But you have arrows that you just tossed in the sky
547. 29:15and hopefully one day they'll hit the target.
548. 29:18They got bathed in four.
549. 29:19There's no way they will hit the target
550. 29:21that got bathed in four.
551. 29:22If the warriors who they've been entrusted to,
552. 29:24I just tossed them in the sky.
553. 29:26Negligent, negligent.
554. 29:27You know, when you said anchoring in scripture,
555. 29:29if we read Psalm 78, can I read a couple verses really quickly?
556. 29:32So it says, oh my people.
557. 29:33Scriptures always welcome.
558. 29:34Yes, I know, I know, I know you will never see that.
559. 29:36I just don't know about time.
560. 29:37Oh my people, to my instruction incline your ears
561. 29:39to the words of my mouth.
562. 29:40I will open my mouth in a parable.
563. 29:42while other dark sayings of old,
564. 29:43which we have heard and known,
565. 29:46and our fathers have told us,
566. 29:47we will not conceal them from their children,
567. 29:49but tell to the generations to come
568. 29:51the praises of the Lord in his strength,
569. 29:52and his wondrous works that he has done,
570. 29:54for he established a testimony in Jacob,
571. 29:57and appointed a law in Israel,
572. 29:59would you command it our fathers
573. 30:00that they should teach them to their children,
574. 30:03that the generation to come might know,
575. 30:05even the children yet to be born,
576. 30:07that they may arise and tell unto their children,
577. 30:09that they should put their confidence in God,
578. 30:12and not forget the works of God,
579. 30:13but keep his commandments.
580. 30:16So what is God desiring that we know him intimately,
581. 30:20a disciple is a disciplined follower of Christ.
582. 30:23So we are wanting to raise a generation,
583. 30:25not only that they are aware of who God is,
584. 30:28just kind of like up there in the sky,
585. 30:29but they have an intimate knowledge of his works
586. 30:33and his character and who he is
587. 30:34and what he's called them to.
588. 30:36So that they might know, in the scripture and foes there,
589. 30:38we've talked about this on the show,
590. 30:39four or five generations, don't in view there in that it's not going to occur accidentally,
591. 30:45right? It's not going to occur coincidentally, it's not going to even occur by osmosis because we have
592. 30:50to be honest with ourselves about what is the reality of the sinful nature, and what is the reality
593. 30:55of the tone and tenor of the world around us. There are forces that are pressing against
594. 31:02that generational heritage being established in Yahweh worship. And so having the understanding
595. 31:09of that reality should, should punctuate for us the necessity of being intentional here.
596. 31:17It is for many, some of you listening right now, it's a radical thing to come to conclusion
597. 31:21when you hear someone say, hear me say, you realize the primary reason why God gave children
598. 31:26to you so that you would invest your life into pouring Christ into them.
599. 31:32That's the primary reason why he entrusted them to you.
600. 31:34Not so that they can have the newest genes, not so that they can have wonderful Christmas
601. 31:37presence, not so that they can be the most popular, not so that they can be admitted into
602. 31:42the most prestigious school, not so that they have the most successful career. The primary
603. 31:46purpose is entrusted to you, is so that you would be a vessel through which your children
604. 31:51come to know him. That is your primary purpose that God has entrusted to your care.
605. 31:59But oftentimes our investments don't reflect that primacy because we've
606. 32:03Romans 12 and the opposite. We've allowed the world to set the tone for us,
607. 32:07that we're giving smartphones because everybody else has smartphones
608. 32:11and we don't want them to be the only ones that are without it.
609. 32:17Guys, that is actually rebellion against what God requires, requires of us as Christian parents.
610. 32:30The God who speaks.
611. 32:31And of course, He went beyond even the Old Testament law in the Sermon on the Mount saying,
612. 32:36you've heard it said, you shall not commit adultery.
613. 32:39I will tell you that if you've lost it in your heart, you have already committed the
614. 32:43adultery.
615. 32:44And then I realize something.
616. 32:45I can't believe less than Jesus believed, and he had absolute confidence in the Old Testament.
617. 32:54The God Who Speaks at resources.afa.net.
618. 33:04Hamilton Quarter Podcast and One-Minute Common Terrors are available at aFR.net.
619. 33:10Back to the Hamilton Quarter on American Family Radio.
620. 33:15Welcome back to the Hamilton Corner, Abraham Hamilton the third here with my lovely wife,
621. 33:18Maria Hamilton the first and only get it right and keep it right.
622. 33:23We're talking about the necessity of having clarity concerning what is primary in parenting.
623. 33:30I understand it may be radical for some people to hear, but the primary purpose for which God
624. 33:35is bless Christian parents with children is so that the parents would be invested in pouring
625. 33:42Christ into their children.
626. 33:43And when I ask this question, I know you get this a lot too.
627. 33:48Does your parenting guarantee that your child will be a Christian?
628. 33:52Yes, my goal is to make perfect children who will be perfect when they are older.
629. 33:57No, no, no, does it guarantee it?
630. 34:00No, definitely not.
631. 34:01Are we imperfect?
632. 34:02Yes.
633. 34:03Are there flaws?
634. 34:05Do we allow things in that we were like, oh, we shouldn't have allowed that in our home,
635. 34:08you know, and it came in and all that.
636. 34:10Man, yes, like we are trying our very best to obey Christ and to follow what He has revealed
637. 34:16to us imperfectly as, you know, as reality allows.
638. 34:21That's true.
639. 34:22We all are trying.
640. 34:23It doesn't guarantee it.
641. 34:25It does not guarantee it.
642. 34:26But you know God's ways work, right?
643. 34:29Like it's not like a hundred percent guarantee because it ain't based on our efforts.
644. 34:33It's based on the Spirit of God and His power.
645. 34:36It's a supernatural transformation that takes place.
646. 34:39did in us and it does in them and our children.
647. 34:42And so we trust the power of God,
648. 34:44that the word of God is real and it is true
649. 34:47and it penetrates and it divides
650. 34:49and the Holy Spirit convicts.
651. 34:52So we know that that is happening.
652. 34:54So are we expecting quote unquote success
653. 34:57in the way that we define success,
654. 34:59which means that we want them to know Christ?
655. 35:02I expect it.
656. 35:03I expect it now.
657. 35:04I remember earlier in our marriage, I was like,
658. 35:06can we even do this?
659. 35:07Share the question, share the question.
660. 35:08That's a real question.
661. 35:09I would ask you.
662. 35:10Yeah, but I would ask you out because you grew up in the church and I didn't, right?
663. 35:13So all I came from was the world as far as like formative years were just very worldly,
664. 35:19not only in my life, but just people that I knew.
665. 35:22And so you grew up in the church and I know you had all kinds of worldly influences.
666. 35:26But my question to you was, can we raise children that know Christ?
667. 35:30Can we raise?
668. 35:31And I'm not talking about perfection.
669. 35:32Please hear me when I say that.
670. 35:33And that know Christ as children.
671. 35:35Can we raise children who worship the Lord,
672. 35:38who have the heart of God,
673. 35:41like have a heart soften toward the Lord,
674. 35:43who receive correction, who desire conviction,
675. 35:45who want to shed sin, who understand who God is?
676. 35:48Can we raise children four, five, six, seven,
677. 35:50eight, all formative years in that way,
678. 35:53where we can see them closing their eyes in worship?
679. 35:56When we can say, oh, it makes me cry.
680. 35:58When we can see them, you know, truly feeling convicted
681. 36:01when a Holy Spirit penetrates their hearts.
682. 36:03Is that real?
683. 36:04Can we do that?
684. 36:05I had never met a child that around me
685. 36:08before, you know, earlier on in our marriage.
686. 36:10And so now am I confident about the power of God?
687. 36:13Yes, because I've seen it in my life personally
688. 36:15and I've seen it in my children.
689. 36:17And we don't have perfect children.
690. 36:19And our oldest is only quote, unquote 15.
691. 36:21I say only quote, unquote, because, you know, yes,
692. 36:23other people have praised, you know, children who are adults
693. 36:25and praise God for that.
694. 36:26And we also have friends who've raised them
695. 36:28and they know Christ and they're living for the Lord now.
696. 36:31As a ghost.
697. 36:32They're known the Lord from the youth up.
698. 36:33Correct.
699. 36:33And Timothy, it's in the scriptures
700. 36:36that they can know Christ from their youth up.
701. 36:38And so our 15 year old, our 13 year old, our 11 year old,
702. 36:43they know Jesus, know him, you know intimately know him.
703. 36:47You know when we say the word no, not just like aware of him,
704. 36:49but like intimately know him and desire to glorify him
705. 36:53with all of the, what's it called,
706. 36:57the influences from the outside,
707. 36:59because we're not in a bubble, you know,
708. 37:00we live in this world and we experience things,
709. 37:04but they know Christ and they're growing,
710. 37:06and they sin, but they repent and they're growing.
711. 37:09And so, man, it's possible because God's arms
712. 37:14have not liked short, he's not impotent.
713. 37:17And so we have to submit to what he says and see him work.
714. 37:20Amen.
715. 37:21So practically, and we had a guest that stumbled upon us
716. 37:26where we were in the midst of our day,
717. 37:28you actually teaching the children.
718. 37:30Yes, today brother Brad shout out Brad Brad. He came over
719. 37:34It just happened to come at that time practically
720. 37:39What would you say if someone says okay, so Maria here? What you saying?
721. 37:42But practically how do I how do I go about accomplishing or should I say?
722. 37:47I'm gonna say a statement then we'll go back to my question
723. 37:50Because I asked the question about about can we guarantee it the call of the believer is not to guarantee that your children would come save
724. 37:57the requirement from Jesus is that we are obedient to what He requires of us.
725. 38:02What is foremost required of a servant is that He is found faithful.
726. 38:06So the Lord doesn't want us to pursue this course because yes, and by doing this we guarantee
727. 38:12this outcome. No, the Lord wants our hearts to be so captured by Him that it is mortifying to us
728. 38:19to consider the possibility that we would be disobedient to what our King requires of us.
729. 38:24Now a person has heard you is hearing you talk about this Marine and they would say okay
730. 38:29I'm with you. I agree with what you what you've said. How do I practically go about doing this?
731. 38:35What was your first I can't do that alone, right? I was I called to be a single parent
732. 38:40So I don't do this alone
733. 38:41So both of us set the tone in our home for Christ to be center
734. 38:47Amen
735. 38:47We have fun and we have experiences and we clown and all the things and we dance and everything
736. 38:52but Christ is the center and that is non-negotiable and it is understood.
737. 38:57Amen.
738. 38:58What I do is different from what you do practically because of our schedules
739. 39:03and the different roles that we have in our home, right?
740. 39:06And so one thing that I always say to parents that is extremely important
741. 39:10and I know that you've always advocated for this and you helped me even embrace it early on
742. 39:14when the children were little, is that if you don't do anything else in the day,
743. 39:17you open up the scriptures.
744. 39:19And so opening the Word of God, because the Word of God is not only,
745. 39:27sounds so silly, the Word of God, but it is potent.
746. 39:30It's alive.
747. 39:30It is alive.
748. 39:31It is potent.
749. 39:32It penetrates and it opens eyes.
750. 39:35And so we have to open up the Word of God with them every day.
751. 39:39Can we be accused of preaching at them or holding service at home?
752. 39:43I don't care what we're accused of.
753. 39:44I know what we're doing.
754. 39:46And I know there need to be obedience to the King of Kings.
755. 39:48And he says that everything that pertains to life
756. 39:51and godliness is found in his word.
757. 39:53And so my children need life and they need godliness.
758. 39:55I'm going to the word with them every day.
759. 39:57And so we open it up every day.
760. 39:59We're going through, my children.
761. 40:01And like guys, this is not to break.
762. 40:02I'm just talking about practically how we've done this.
763. 40:05God convicted us of this years ago.
764. 40:07My older two for sure have read the Bible through
765. 40:10from Genesis to Revelation.
766. 40:12Not because they have been forced to,
767. 40:15not because they have been, you know, uh,
768. 40:18trained to be like these super soldier Christians that they have to read the Bible,
769. 40:21like a robot? No, but because every day we open up the scriptures personally for them
770. 40:27in the mornings.
771. 40:29Or at night time, depending on if a morning child or, you know, you just based on the child,
772. 40:33but, but we read the scriptures. So we have read through the entire, every book of the Bible
773. 40:38together. And I know they have independently. And so that's not the break. I'm just talking
774. 40:43about a practical understanding of how incredibly important it is to open up the word of God
775. 40:47with your children. And what do we do practically? Every morning we open up the Bible and we are
776. 40:52in right now, we're in first, just finished yesterday. First Thessalonians, we're starting
777. 40:57today, second Thessalonians chapter one. And so we read a chapter a day and we ask questions and
778. 41:02we figure out what God is saying and what is, what, what does the original author intended to write?
779. 41:07What does the original audience receive? What is it that it applies to us? Which, you know,
780. 41:12It does apply to us today because we're Christians Paul wrote to Christians in the Senaika
781. 41:15We are Christians we receive the word of God and we live in we apply it
782. 41:18And so we break it down as best as possible to the my three-year-old my four-year-old almost four-year-old to my eight-year-old
783. 41:24To our our nine-year-old and ten-year-old week they can understand guys y'all know children if they can recite
784. 41:32songs
785. 41:34Like verbatim movie scripts movie scripts
786. 41:36They can learn the Word of God.
787. 41:39It is not too much for them.
788. 41:40Do we have to sometimes go into topics
789. 41:42that we may be concerned about?
790. 41:44Because, you know, Mommy, what is sexual immorality?
791. 41:47Well, we gotta talk about what sexual immorality is, you know?
792. 41:49And we do it to a planet level with wisdom
793. 41:51that they can receive without,
794. 41:53yes, without completely ruining them.
795. 41:55The Word of God is not gonna ruin them.
796. 41:57One thing that is incredibly important
797. 41:58that we understand practically when we read the Bible
798. 42:01is that we have to trust that the author of the Bible,
799. 42:03who is God cares for the heart of the child.
800. 42:07So he's not going to ruin them or damage them
801. 42:09when we talk about difficult issues.
802. 42:10So practically first, we'll be reading the word of God.
803. 42:13Go ahead.
804. 42:14Yeah, no, absolutely right.
805. 42:15I remember one of these conversations
806. 42:17that we've had to engage in ourselves
807. 42:20and know our footing, you know,
808. 42:22people will listen to show you know,
809. 42:23we're a discipleship in the home family.
810. 42:25Some people call it homeschooling,
811. 42:27but really it's an investment in discipleship.
812. 42:29But with some people may not know,
813. 42:31we didn't, I wasn't homeschooled in the rear,
814. 42:32wasn't homeschool, we didn't have anybody around us
815. 42:34who did it.
816. 42:35So we didn't have like, oh, we can do what that family does.
817. 42:37We didn't have that.
818. 42:38We didn't have that at all.
819. 42:39And so I remember we had to have a conversation one time
820. 42:41and you were feeling the weight of the responsibility
821. 42:45of that because we responded to this as a call from God.
822. 42:48Not like, oh, this is how we prefer to educate our children.
823. 42:53No, this is like, this is God summoning us to this.
824. 42:55And I said, babe, just to be real practical,
825. 43:00If you got a load of laundry, dishes,
826. 43:03and five subjects on the table that you wanna delve into,
827. 43:08I don't care if I come home
828. 43:09and the laundry's not folded, open the word of God
829. 43:12with the children.
830. 43:13The priority in this home is God's word.
831. 43:16Now, it doesn't mean me lazy and me have a sloppy house.
832. 43:19Nobody needs to be nasty, that's dirty.
833. 43:21But in terms of priority, what is priority?
834. 43:23And to say, if you have spent time in the word
835. 43:27with our children, it has been a successful day.
836. 43:30It has been a successful day. This other stuff we can get to after that. Yeah, but that is priority
837. 43:38And then one other thing and and this is specifically the parents with younger children
838. 43:42This is something that God God helped us to understand
839. 43:45That well, what do you do a younger children before they become the Christians?
840. 43:48They adore you
841. 43:50But boy them joke is a sentence. Yes
842. 43:54They sent us
843. 43:55You don't have to have a teacher child. I'd say mine they get that by default factory settings
844. 44:00So what do you do in that scenario?
845. 44:03The Lord helped us to see we still use the word of God to train Godly character so that
846. 44:09not if when there is misbehavior, the child is not merely confronted with not meeting
847. 44:15Daddy's and Mommy's expectations.
848. 44:18The child is confronted with their own sinfulness.
849. 44:22You didn't take your brother's toy because you just liked it better.
850. 44:27You didn't take your brother's toy just because you're a bad boy or a bad girl.
851. 44:30No, no, no.
852. 44:31You took your brother's toy because there is sin in your heart.
853. 44:34That's right.
854. 44:35And this is evidence of your need for a Savior.
855. 44:40And so the Lord helped us to see that we use God's word to train Godly character even
856. 44:44before they say it.
857. 44:47By doing so, we introduced them to the fact that God has a standard of expectation.
858. 44:53And you are not meeting his expectations because there's a heart problem and that it will continue
859. 44:59to be a heart problem until you come to Christ.
860. 45:05And using the Word of God to train God the character as an on-ramp for gospel presentation.
861. 45:10Yeah, yeah.
862. 45:11And we have, you know, amplanic notes.
863. 45:14I know that when our kids, when our kids sin against one another, because that's the most
864. 45:18common, you know, ways that their sin manifests with one another.
865. 45:23We can correct them and we can even punish or discipline them.
866. 45:30And we can just say, don't do that, it is wrong, we don't do that in this home.
867. 45:34Or we can say, it is wrong, don't do that.
868. 45:38And this is why we don't do that.
869. 45:40This is why the why is always connected to the heart of God.
870. 45:44Why is it that we do not take our siblings toy without asking?
871. 45:48Why is it that we don't throw rice at our sibling when daddy said don't throw rice?
872. 45:53You know that is a real letting do.
873. 45:55Everyone, it really happens.
874. 45:56And so why is it that we say,
875. 45:58go to your room and do not come out until we come talk to you?
876. 46:01Right?
877. 46:01Why is it that we pull out a belt
878. 46:03when it needs physical discipline?
879. 46:06When the child needs that?
880. 46:07Why do we do that?
881. 46:08It's because we need to communicate to them
882. 46:10the severity of sin and how it destroys them.
883. 46:15Because sin destroys us.
884. 46:17And so our kids need to know that at four,
885. 46:20I need you to grow to understand
886. 46:22because when the Holy Spirit captures their heart,
887. 46:23oh God, they can get to the place and they realize,
888. 46:26oh, I mean, they're right the whole time.
889. 46:28Sin will kill me.
890. 46:30And so we have to hate sin.
891. 46:31God hates sin, we hate sin.
892. 46:33Amen.
893. 46:34God is loving, we are loving.
894. 46:35God is kind, we are kind.
895. 46:36We are like Christ.
896. 46:38We are going to be like Christ when they come to know Christ
897. 46:41at the age where they understand,
898. 46:43you know, what God has done for them on the cross.
899. 46:44And they repent from their sins and turn to Him.
900. 46:46At that point, they can realize these things are real.
901. 46:51sin will destroy me.
902. 46:52I am to be like Christ, God calls me to obey Him.
903. 46:55His ways are best, and I can now understand
904. 46:59that I can live that, that I can live that.
905. 47:02So I think practically it's incredibly important
906. 47:04for us to identify the sin and expose it to the child.
907. 47:08It is not enough to make models of ourselves.
908. 47:11We don't do that because I don't like it.
909. 47:13I don't like that behavior, so don't do it.
910. 47:15Oh, because it embarrass me.
911. 47:16Or yes, or it embarrass me in public.
912. 47:18No, this is the reality is
913. 47:20that we are making disciples of our children,
914. 47:23so then they are disciples of Christ, not disciples of us.
915. 47:25Not clones of us, yes.
916. 47:26Exactly, we are all disciples of Christ, us and them.
917. 47:30And we're not equal, right?
918. 47:31Let's say that, let's make sure we understand that.
919. 47:33We're, daddy and I, to our kids,
920. 47:36are not equal to the children in regards of like,
921. 47:39you know, we're all Christians,
922. 47:40so then therefore we're all on the same plane.
923. 47:43We literally have authority over you
924. 47:45because God places an authority and we love you.
925. 47:47So you are going to obey us.
926. 47:50But we are also walking for the Lord
927. 47:52and living for the Lord and so are you.
928. 47:53Mm.
929. 47:55That music is so disrespectful
930. 47:57because I was about to ask you a question
931. 47:59about behavioral confirmation,
932. 48:04behavioral conformity versus heart transformation.
933. 48:07But the music is so disrespectful,
934. 48:09I don't have time to ask you that question.
935. 48:10Next time.
936. 48:11So I guess you have to come back again.
937. 48:13All right now.
938. 48:15I think I like you a little bit,
939. 48:16so maybe we'll do it.
940. 48:19behavioral modification versus heart transformation.
941. 48:23Guys is real in the field.
942. 48:25If we don't get this right,
943. 48:27it doesn't matter what tax policy, immigration policy,
944. 48:30those things are reducing significance
945. 48:34if we don't understand how to exalt Christ in our homes.
946. 48:39The views and opinions expressed in this broadcast
947. 48:41may not necessarily reflect those
948. 48:43of the American Family Association
949. 48:45or American Family Radio.