April 28, 2025 · 47:45

("Best-of" Edition from 10/13/23) The Mrs. has returned. Sanctification is intrinsic to marriage.

Marriage & FamilyBible & TheologyCulture & Media

Show notes

0:00 - 15:00. Genesis 2:15-18. We don’t interpret scripture through the lens of culture. We interpret culture through the lens of Scripture. 15:00 - 31:00. The Mrs. has returned. Sanctification is intrinsic to marriage. 31:00 - 48:00. There is one Holy Spirit and you aren’t Him. To donate call : 877-616-2396

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877-616-2396

Full transcript Auto-generated · 8,886 words

Transcribed with OpenAI Whisper (base.en). Timestamps are approximate. Lightly cleaned for readability; quotations from on-air callers may include filler words. Use the audio player above for the authoritative recording.

0:00Darkness is not an affirmative force.
0:02It simply reoccupies the space vacated by the light.
0:06This is the Hamilton Quarter on American Family Radio.
0:10It should be uncomfortable for a believer to live as a hypocrite.
0:15Delivery people out of the bondage of mainstream media.
0:18And the philosophies of this world.
0:20God has called you and me to be his ambassador.
0:23Even in this dark moment.
0:26Let's not miss our moment.
0:28And now the Hamilton Corner.
0:31Good evening, everyone.
0:34Welcome to the Hamilton Corner here on American Family Radio.
0:38I am your host, Abraham Hamilton III.
0:41And if you, it seems I'm a little giddy, it's true because I have a favorite guest in studio with me today.
0:48See, I can't even speak, but we'll get to that in a moment.
0:54I hope that as you pondered yesterday and considered the events, even the things we discussed on
1:02this program, that the Lord was able to minister to you effectively to enable you to see how he
1:11would have you respond to where we are at this current state in our nation.
1:15But before we get into all that too much so, I want to remind you at this very moment many
1:19of you are transitioning from your part-time jobs where you generate an income to your
1:24full-time jobs where you cultivate an outcome. And as you do so, understand, I pray you understand
1:32the primacy that God places on family. You know, we're going to get into this later on, but the
1:38first institution that God established, having the wherewithal to unfold human history, as
1:44well as the created order, however he chose to do so, he intentionally establishes as the
1:49first human institution, the family with marriage at the center.
1:55It's amazing that the marital union in the marital unit is the only one that God allows
2:04to be described in His holy word as being a living, breathing illustration of the Messiah's
2:10relationship to His bride, the church.
2:15is intense warfare concerning the family because the old deluder Satan is a chief counterfeit
2:26and his desire as the Apostle John articulated it is to steal, kill and destroy. He comes
2:34only to steal, kill and destroy. But Jesus Christ came that you might have life, Zoe
2:40life that you might have life and have it more abundantly that Zoe life, life to the full,
2:47which encompasses our thriving on this side of eternity
2:51in addition to what we get to enjoy
2:54and what we anticipate even now
2:56that we'll be able to enjoy on the other side of eternity.
2:59So as you're transitioning at this very moment,
3:02I want to and encourage you to understand the primacy
3:06and the significance that God places on family.
3:09Understand that when the scripture unfolds the fact
3:14that the Lord established the marital union with a portion of his spirit in it.
3:20It reveals the reality that marriage is not merely, not merely a human contractual institution.
3:31To the Word of God, we go. I want to go here to Genesis chapter 2, and I may toggle over to Matthew
3:42chapter 19, but in Genesis chapter 2, you have a portion of
3:47scripture in that I'm just going to state this straight up and
3:51straight out right now. We as followers of the Lord Jesus
3:56Christ as disciples of Yeshua Hamashiach, we do not allow the
4:02culture to dictate to us the parameters through which that we
4:07evaluate in interpret scripture. The culture does not tell us or
4:12to establish for us our marching orders for how we approach scripture.
4:18In fact, it's actually the opposite.
4:21The Word of God gives us the lens through which we evaluate culture, but not the other
4:26way around.
4:27And we'll take a few moments now to go through something in scripture that I believe that
4:31has resulted in a great loss in the body of Christ because we've allowed culture to rob
4:38terminology and concepts from us that causes us to stand a sconce,
4:45to stand a distance from the truth of scripture, Genesis chapter two,
4:52verses 15 through 18. I want you to see this. Here we go.
4:56Then the Lord God took the man and put him into the garden of Eden to
5:01cultivate it and to keep it.
5:05The Lord God commanded the man saying from any tree of the garden,
5:09you may eat freely, but from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, you shall not eat.
5:16For in the day that you eat from it, you will surely die. Then the Lord God said,
5:23it is not good for the man to be alone. I will make him a helper, suitable for him.
5:35A couple of things I want to point out to you. You've heard me say this before,
5:39but the scripture is explicit in revealing that Adam was not created inside of the Garden of Eden.
5:46He was created outside of the Garden of Eden,
5:48quitting to life outside of the Garden of Eden, and then placed into the Garden,
5:52which was east from where Adam was created. This same chapter, Genesis 2, verse 8 says it.
5:59It's affirmed and confirmed in chapter 2, verse 15 that we just read,
6:03the Lord God places the man in the garden after having made him.
6:08All right.
6:09Then the next thing you see is the Lord giving Adam and trusting him with his word.
6:14When he says the Lord God commanded the man saying,
6:17from any tree of the garden, you may eat freely.
6:20But from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, you shall not eat.
6:24For in the day that you eat from it, you will surely die.
6:28When God entrusted Adam with his word to his command here,
6:32He also made him a conveyor of his word.
6:38Why can I say that so confidently?
6:40The Lord told us already in verse 15
6:43that the Lord God took the man and put him in the garden
6:46to cultivate it and to keep it.
6:50Cultivation speaks to the nurturing
6:57to the reproductive capacity that he required of Adam,
7:02replenishing that got required of Adam, that the Lord establishing Adam, that, that, and
7:08before he even got to Adam, a principle that everything is to reproduce after its own kind.
7:13Genesis 1, 26 to 28 already announced that mankind was ordained to be fruitful, multiply,
7:18replenish the earth and subdue it.
7:20This fruitfulness and multiplication was to be both quantitative and qualitative.
7:26So Adam, with the instructions to be fruitful, multiply, replenish the earth.
7:30So at this point he does not have a companion.
7:34He is required to multiply and to be fruitful with the same quality that God deposited in
7:41him.
7:42So the command that Adam was to receive, he was entrusted with conveying.
7:46In addition to being a cultivator of the garden, Adam was called to be a keeper or protector
7:51of it.
7:52One of the mechanisms for protecting the garden was not merely a physical protection, but protecting
7:58it with the word that God had given him.
8:02All right?
8:03Now then immediately after God gives Adam his word, making him not only a recipient of
8:11it, but a conveyor of his word, the very next thing you see in the beginning, before rebellion
8:20was on the scene is you see God introducing an idea to Adam.
8:26verse 18, then the Lord God said, it is not good for the man to be alone. Who was it in
8:35scripture that first identified the reality that aloneness for the man was not good or
8:43to say it in the opposite way. Who was it that introduced into human history the notion
8:52that having a suitable helper was good.
8:57That was God's idea.
9:00I've said repeatedly that marriage is good
9:02because God has said that it was good.
9:04Adam didn't sit there thinking,
9:06nobody knows the trouble I've seen,
9:10nobody knows I sorrow you're.
9:16God is the one who said,
9:18Hey, you're Adam, it ain't good for you to be alone, bro.
9:21And then God says, I will make him a helper suitable for him.
9:32Now, when you heard me say that H word, I say, say with me, Jeff, helper.
9:39Don't say it all with me.
9:44Help her.
9:46There's some women listening to me right now saying, then those are the turned up.
9:51The lips are like this.
9:52Why can't he help me?
9:57And you know what that reveals?
10:00That reveals that cultural imperatives have intruded upon our approach to scripture.
10:08Why is it that many of the women in our country and some of you who are listening to me right now, some of the men who are listening to me right now,
10:15you immediately think that when the Lord describes the woman who was to come as a helper to Adam, you automatically think
10:24something negative. I'll tell you why.
10:29Second and Third Wave Feminism.
10:31Because of the proliferation of Second and Third Wave Feminism,
10:36the idea that a wife was made as the scripture reveals from the man,
10:42for the man, and presented to the man as his helper,
10:50you automatically think that that's negative.
10:54Now before you go too far in your negatories,
10:58I want you to think for a moment about the Triune Godhead.
11:01as your Lord has revealed himself throughout scripture, though the word Trinity is not in scripture.
11:07The term was coined by Augustine. Thank you, Augustine.
11:11But the Trinity is in scripture.
11:13When God reveals that the Triune Godhead consists of what?
11:17God the Father, God the Son, God the Holy Spirit.
11:21Can you answer for me who else in scripture is referred to as the helper,
11:29the third person of the Trinity.
11:36Holy Spirit is described in scripture as the helper,
11:42but many of us automatically think the term helper
11:45is a downgrade to women because we've allowed the culture
11:50to dictate to us how we approach scripture.
11:54The word helper here, and it's not just helper,
11:57but the Bible says helper, suitable.
12:01Sometimes we try to make the King James verbiage
12:07as if it's one word, help me.
12:08No, it's a helper that is meat or a helper that is fit,
12:11a helper that is suitable for the man.
12:15The word helper here is the Hebrew word,
12:17Izer, Izer.
12:20And again, the phrase is not just helper,
12:22it's helper suitable.
12:23It's Izer-neged, Izer-neged, helper suitable.
12:30The word Izer literally means one who builds in
12:33that which is lacking.
12:35It literally means one who aids in the time of disaster.
12:39It means a suitable companion or a corresponding opposite.
12:45This is what the term means.
12:48When the Lord reveals to Adam that is not good for him
12:52to be alone, you should note that it immediately follows
12:56Yahweh giving Adam his word.
12:59The giving of his word follows the Lord making the observation
13:02that I've placed you in the garden to dress it in the keep it.
13:05which reveals that Adam, you are not going to be capable of doing what I've placed you in the garden to do without my word and without my helper.
13:17But you see, when we allow culture to dictate to us our marching orders as a potential scripture, we miss out on the fact that the Lord allows, no, more than allows, the Lord describes what the wife is to the man, the same thing that he describes, Holy Spirit to be to the believer, the helper.
13:41I'm sharing this with you because if we continue to allow the world to set our marching orders for our approach to Scripture,
13:49we're going to continue to miss out on things that God has ordained for us.
13:52The Lord is literally revealing that He has given the man a purpose that cannot be full-filled,
14:01completely filled without the helper. Now to be clear, this does not
14:07Uh, exclude the reality that there are some who are called vocationally to lifelong
14:13singleness and notice this next part, celibacy.
14:17You can't say that Lord Call did be single, you ain't got the gift of celibacy.
14:23You also cannot claim that the Lord has called you life to lifelong singleness because you've
14:27had a horrible dating history.
14:28No, that's a vocational call.
14:31But because of the first command of mankind, fruitful is a multiplication, replenishing
14:36the earth and some doing it, the default posture for most men and most women will be
14:42Ordinance for marriage including the beautiful privilege of the One Fles Union.
14:48But make no mistake about it, we must refuse to continue to allow the culture to dictate
14:53to us how we are the approach scripture.
14:55No scripture dictates dictates how we approach culture.
15:05Shiting lightning to the darkness, this is the Hamilton Corner on American family radio.
15:12Welcome back to the Hamilton Corner.
15:13I want to say one more thing from the scripture.
15:17We probably say some more things about the scripture
15:18as we go through the remainder of the interview.
15:20But before I get to my lovely guest,
15:23I wanted to say one more thing
15:24because this is something that comes up frequently
15:26as we travel the country and speak to different people,
15:29they get a little bit confused about these things.
15:31But when Jesus was queried about marriage
15:33and he answered the question in Matthew chapter 19,
15:36this is something that is often left out of the conversation.
15:40As you've heard me say before, Jesus affirms
15:42what he said in Genesis chapter one in Genesis chapter two,
15:47because he is the word made flesh.
15:49He is the word who was in the beginning.
15:53Jesus is eternally preexistence, preexistent.
15:57He was there and spoke, let there be light.
16:02All right.
16:04So he said this when query about marriage,
16:07have you not read that he who created them
16:09from the beginning made them both male and female?
16:12and said, for this reason,
16:15shall a man leave his father and mother
16:18and be joined to his wife.
16:21And the two shall become one flesh,
16:25just in case you don't know,
16:27this is referring specifically, yes,
16:29to the spirituality of oneness,
16:31but specifically to the physical reality of oneness,
16:36the complimentary conjugal one-flesh union
16:40that can only be enjoyed by a man and a woman.
16:44Yeah.
16:46Let me just say something before I go too far afield.
16:50It's unfortunate that we allow the world
16:52to set the standards for how we discuss
16:56this glorious blessing that God has given us
17:00to enjoy within the context, the exclusive context
17:04that he's ordained for us to enjoy within.
17:07Most Christians include in myself or talk,
17:10don't do it, don't stop, don't stay away,
17:12so we have this frame of mind concerning
17:16What is a blessing in addition to being enjoyable?
17:21But without the world of corner to market on conversations,
17:24so that when we have Christians who are engaging
17:27holy matrimony, they don't know how to fully thrive.
17:31We don't know how to fully thrive within the intimate confines
17:34of what the Lord is blessed us with.
17:36That's a conversation for another day,
17:37which we may need to get into as well,
17:40which you had to probably had to put the babies away
17:42for that conversation.
17:43But getting back to the scripture,
17:45verse five and said,
17:46this reason, shall a man leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife and the two shall become
17:50one flesh." Verse 6, so they are no longer two, but what one flesh, what therefore God has joined
17:58together, let no man separate. When Jesus affirms what he said in Genesis 1 and Genesis 2,
18:05and mentions that what God has joined together, let no man separate. It reveals,
18:11not reveals, it confirms the fact that the marital union is a pre-political institution,
18:18which means that the marital union, the marriage unit and marriage as a definition existed before
18:26there was ever any civil government establishment.
18:30Modern iterations of civil government post-date God's establishment of marriage, which means
18:35His government do not have the authority to
18:39derogate from God's definition for marriage.
18:43He is its designer, he alone is its definer, government
18:47at best has a wherewithal to uphold and to support
18:52what God has established.
18:55What about adults of capacity to make contracts?
18:57Listen, adults have to wear with all to make contracts about all kinds of things.
19:01But a marriage is far more than an agreement between
19:04consenting adults, which is why the scripture reveals that God has ordained it.
19:08When the Malachi refers to it, he says, the one-fless union includes a portion of God's
19:12spirit within it because marriage is a pre-political institution.
19:17Now, having said all of that, I would like to welcome to the program my favorite guest
19:25and a half.
19:26Y'all can hear the half of guest, not a half, a whole guest, but he just really spoke.
19:31We David is in studio as well rolling on the floor with his cookies.
19:35But my guess with the program is my lovely, beautiful, jaw-dropping, heart-stopping,
19:44which he walks in the room when the queen come in town, everything.
19:48Shut you down, my wife.
19:50Mrs. Maria Hamilton, matriarch of Hamill, Tony.
19:53Hey, hey, everyone.
19:55Thank you for joining me in studio.
19:56Hi, Tony.
19:57Yes, ma'am.
19:58Thank you for doing this.
20:00of this really is by request because everywhere I'm going lately, they say,
20:04Hey, you're cool.
20:05Well, we really like it when your wife is on.
20:08And I like it when my wife is on.
20:09And there is no one better to have this conversation with other than my wife.
20:16And so maybe you heard me talking to the first segment about he's there in reality
20:19of what God made helpers to be.
20:22One of the things that believers need to understand is that intrinsic to the
20:26marital covenant is God's design for marriage to produce sanctification and the members of
20:35the marriage that the Lord joined us together as much as we enjoy spending time together.
20:39And the truth is my wife is my best friend. That's a fact. I think about anything happening
20:43in my life. The first person I want to talk to is my wife. I could be 10 minutes from home
20:48and guess what I call on my way home even if I'm about to see her, I call her on the phone when I'm
20:51on my way home. That's just the reality of our relationship and it's been that way really since
20:55to the very beginning.
20:57But this reality of sanctification in marriage
20:59is something that I think some people are surprised by.
21:03And when they are experiencing the alcohol
21:05that they're refining fires of sanctification in marriage,
21:08some people are like, ah, too hot, too hot.
21:11Me not want too hot, no, me not like it.
21:14Too warm, too warm.
21:17We want out, but you fail to realize God placed you there,
21:24expressly and explicitly so that these areas that could not be
21:29touched any other way, that they are brought to the surface so
21:32that the draws can be purged and that will continually being
21:36sanctified in the presence of the Lord. So when you hear me talk
21:39about that, what are your initial reactions or responses to the
21:44idea that sanctification is intrinsic to marriage?
21:47Yeah, so one thought that I have is that, you know, the world
21:53And unfortunately, the church has embraced this as well.
21:56The world says that marriage is hard, you know?
21:58And so the idea of marriage, people cringe
22:03because it's hard, it's hard work and it's difficult
22:05and just be ready and like, you know,
22:06all the negativity that surrounds marriage.
22:10And so when you're saying that I was thinking,
22:13man, the Lord really designed it for His purposes
22:16and for His glory, not for our comfort and our enjoyment.
22:20But we do enjoy it if we see it
22:22from God's perspective.
22:24So I think it's incredibly important
22:26that we as believers remove from our minds
22:30this negative perspective of marriage
22:32and embrace God's view of it.
22:35Only that way will we actually enjoy it
22:37and find the blessing that it is and thrive in it
22:42and not just hold on for dear life
22:44or become roommates or anything like that.
22:46Those are all things that are not within God's purposes
22:49because it's supposed to bring him glory.
22:52And so I think that's what, as believers,
22:57we need to really pray about is that the Lord
22:59would help us to remove from our mindset the negativity
23:04and really help us to see it from his perspective.
23:07Amen.
23:08Amen.
23:09Will you finish it, your thought?
23:10Yeah, no, that's the main thing that I was thinking about
23:12because I always, you know, whenever we say that it's hard,
23:15what does it mean for the mayors to be hard?
23:17If we're talking about sanctification,
23:19we're talking about the reality that God wants to grow us
23:22more in the likeness of Christ.
23:25And so we are wicked and we are selfish
23:28and we have our own agendas
23:31and we have our own personalities and our own sinfulness.
23:35Okay, so then God joins us together for his glory
23:38so that the world can see what it looks like
23:41to live for him and so he wants to transform us.
23:44When we were transformed, we are sanctified
23:47and then we bring in glory independently as me and you
23:50separately, glorifying him and our character and in our actions, but then as a unit as well.
23:57And so I think that's very important.
24:00We have several agn-an-ing notes in regards to sanctification.
24:06And we use that word intentionally, you know, because when we think about growing and the
24:11Lord stretching us and that maybe that's why the world says it's hard, is because we're
24:15looking at it from a negative vantage point, you know, because sanctification is a positive
24:18thing.
24:19is a good thing.
24:20So when the Lord is, is you have better words for this,
24:24but you know, buffing the sharp edges or whatever,
24:28you know, like, or softening us and transforming us
24:31and molding us and shaping us until we is,
24:33that's doesn't feel good.
24:34But it is a positive thing.
24:36It is a good thing.
24:37And I want to be more like Jesus, you know what I mean?
24:39Am I going to be perfect?
24:40No, but I do want to be God glorifying.
24:44And as we've been married, I always say that I am a blessing
24:47to my husband, I really am because I help him be sanctified.
24:51Like it's a good thing y'all.
24:53So y'all just embrace the reality
24:56that with all your sinfulness and all your filth
24:59and all your mess, you're coming to marriage
25:02and you, you know, you guys, and for him as well,
25:05you're a blessing, man, you're a blessing.
25:07It's a blessing that you have to grow impatient, you know?
25:09It's great.
25:10So I'm very glad that we would have to enjoy that.
25:14So you're helping me grow impatient.
25:15I'm just, that's my role.
25:17I'm a helper, right?
25:18That's what we say.
25:19I'm a helper, so I'm trying to help you
25:21be more like Jesus.
25:25And so you made a statement that is true
25:27when you have two individuals,
25:28different minds, different experiences,
25:31who are fallen, you know,
25:33but are being joined together.
25:34And what the Lord describes is holy matrimony.
25:37You're going to have the reality of that one is coming together
25:42that will have at different points,
25:45different levels, some challenges, but the challenges do not have to be a
25:49drudgery, do not have to be suffering, doesn't have to be just feeling like you're
25:57being scourged at the pillar, you know, there is joy in recognizing the Lord
26:02shaping and molding us as we're growing closer to one another and being formed
26:06and conformed ever the more to the image of our elder brother Jesus Christ.
26:10Now I'm thinking now, because you mentioned we have anecdotes when there was a particular time in our lives when
26:17You were frustrated with me and I didn't know at the moment until after the fact
26:23But you were frustrated with me because I had said something and then you felt like this dude
26:28I ain't following through on what he said. Do you want to tell the people about that experience? Tell the people yeah, so
26:34Again, it's just growing in the Lord, you know what I mean? So we had talked about
26:38I'm home all day with the kids, praise the Lord, I really enjoy that.
26:42It is what the Lord has called me to.
26:45And Abe goes to work, so we were living in Louisiana at that point at that time, and he
26:49had to go to work all day, so his time with the children was less than my time with the
26:56children.
26:57I was going to court.
26:58Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, your schedule was very busy.
26:59And so we had talked about you spending more time with the kids and being very intentional
27:06about it.
27:07And so one day out of the blue, I remember I'm in the dining room, and you said, hey, I'm
27:11going to run to Home Depot to get something, whatever it was, something fast, and I'll
27:15be right back.
27:16And that moment I thought, based on our conversation prior, that, oh, you should go ahead and take
27:21Christian or oldest one at that time was like maybe four or his little, you should go ahead
27:25and take Christian with you.
27:27I'm thinking in my mind, I didn't say all this to him, but I just say you should take him,
27:30you know, conversations on the drive, you know, one on one time, whatever.
27:33So I was like, hey, you should take him.
27:36and he said, oh no, no, no, I'm just gonna go fast.
27:39You know, I'll go in and out.
27:41That's what he said.
27:42And in my mind, I was like, oh no, he didn't.
27:45Because we'd already talked about this.
27:46We'd already established that you're gonna spend more time
27:48with our kids.
27:49You got a perfect opportunity right here.
27:51Hello, you're gonna, so my flesh said,
27:54tell him about himself.
27:56Let him know that he not doing right.
27:59Because this is what you're supposed to be doing.
28:00This is your first ministry.
28:02Remember your full-time job.
28:03I didn't just start saying that when I got on the radio.
28:05I know, I know you didn't know.
28:07And so, I'm telling him, I know you know,
28:09what I'm saying, I'm asking you to let them know,
28:11I didn't just start saying that, why I got an idea.
28:12That's very true, no, we've been, that's been our ministry.
28:15And so, you know, he left and I was mad.
28:20And you were mad or you were mad.
28:21I was mad, I was mad, I was mad,
28:23because I was mad, I almost called you,
28:25like you were driving, I almost called you like,
28:27what's going on, like, you know, just telling you off.
28:29And I was like, Lord, help me to go for you in this moment.
28:32And that's the whole thing about sanctification.
28:33In the moment, like in the moment, can we crucify our flesh?
28:36In the moment, can we say, Lord, help me to glorify you
28:39right now where my feelings are all messed up,
28:41our emotions, you know, are mad.
28:42I feel justified in my anger.
28:45Lord, help me to glorify you right now.
28:47Like give me what I am lacking right now
28:49by your Holy Spirit.
28:50And so I did, I prayed because I was like, Lord,
28:52I don't wanna do something that is like I'm not glorifying you.
28:55And not only like because I don't wanna fight with him,
28:58but I really just wanna honor God, you know?
29:00And so I just prayed.
29:01I literally just put everything to the side
29:03I was working on and I was like, Lord,
29:05you know what we talked about.
29:06You know what your desire for him is
29:08and you know what you have ministered to him about
29:10in regards to our children
29:12and you know what you have shown us
29:13and me and myself with the kids
29:14and how important it is to invest important to our children
29:17and he had the perfect opportunity and he,
29:19you know, and I'm just going off with the Lord,
29:21you know, just praying and asking him just help me to be calm
29:24and help me when he comes back, you know,
29:25not to make it a, not to act out of my flesh.
29:29Man, you walked in.
29:31when I came back home.
29:32When you came back home.
29:33From Home Depot.
29:33From Home Depot.
29:34With the bag in my hand.
29:35That's right.
29:36As soon as he walked in y'all,
29:37I could have told him something at that point,
29:39but I just knew the Lord said, just be quiet.
29:41Just be quiet, just let me handle it.
29:43And so he walks in and the first thing out of his mouth,
29:46he said, babe, I am so sorry, you're so right.
29:49The Holy Spirit convicted me on the way to Home Depot.
29:52And he showed me that I should have taken him with me
29:54and you're right.
29:55Man, I dropped what I was doing.
29:57I was like, Lord, you're faithful.
29:59Not because I got like quote unquote my way,
30:01but it's because I realized I do not have to nag him.
30:04The Spirit of God will convict men of sin.
30:07And so I am not the Holy Spirit.
30:10I can never try to be.
30:11When I try to be, I mess it up.
30:13The Holy Spirit of God will penetrate the heart of man.
30:17And if your husband's ladies are seeking the Lord,
30:21and if they are wanting to grow in the Lord,
30:25the Holy Spirit will open their eyes
30:27and will minister to them beyond your words.
30:30And so my encouragement is that we will not nag.
30:32Y'all know what the scripture says about it,
30:34that we won't nag,
30:35but that we would submit ourselves first to the Lord.
30:37I asked him to transform us
30:39and then trust that he will minister to them.
30:43Man, yeah, it was not,
30:45I'll explain it from my side.
30:46It's true.
30:47I was, you guys know I was going to court.
30:51At this time I had, I was operating in a dual jurisdiction.
30:55So it was a jurisdiction that had criminal cases
30:58one week, civil cases in the other week, I was a criminal prosecutor.
31:02And so I would have to appear in court on one week and then the opposite week, I would
31:06have a little bit more flexibility.
31:07I said to do my caseload, put my back off and stuff I had to do.
31:11And so I had expressed to Maria, I felt like I'd got to the place where that whole work
31:16life balance had gotten out of balance.
31:19And I knew I needed to spend more one on one time with our children.
31:23At that time, we only had two.
31:25And I expressed that to you.
31:27And then that was in one conversation moving on, then something came up and I needed to go
31:32to the store, go to Home Depot or wherever.
31:35And I said, I needed to go.
31:37And so you asked me, you didn't say it this way, but you realize, well, you're a reeko.
31:43What an opportunity.
31:45Just the very thing that you said, my lord, that you wanted to accomplish.
31:49Now the Heavenly Father has provided you opportunity.
31:52Will you take him to which I said, I'm just going to run out of you right back.
32:07the Hamilton Quarter podcast and one-minute commentary
32:10that's available at aFR.net.
32:13Back to the Hamilton Quarter on American Family Radio.
32:17Welcome back to the Hamilton Corner, Abraham Hamilton,
32:20the third here joined by my lovely wife, Mrs. Maria Hamilton.
32:23And we were just sharing real life testimony
32:27of the very thing that we're endeavoring to encourage you
32:29with the Lord has worked in us and continues
32:33to work into us even now.
32:35And I was explaining after having made
32:38the grandiose proclamation that I needed
32:40to spend more time one on one.
32:42I was with my children here,
32:43I was with an opportunity to do so.
32:45And my wife rightfully so pointing out to me
32:48that here you have this opportunity,
32:50but me being so caught up in what I think,
32:54I'm just running to come right back.
32:56You know, I know I said that,
32:57but reality is sometime the children
33:01can make it take too long, you know,
33:02Look at that stuff and asking for everything.
33:05Asking for everything in the world.
33:06And of course we need to teach himself control,
33:08but I don't want to do that right.
33:09I just want to go in, then I want to go out.
33:12So when she made the suggestion to me to take my boy,
33:15well, I love spending time with him,
33:16but my son likes to talk.
33:18He does.
33:20You know, stop, stop, stop, stop, go out,
33:21I'm gonna be right back because I'm thinking,
33:22well, I'm gonna spend time with him while I get back home.
33:25You know, but as soon as I got in the car,
33:29the Lord began to deal with me on the drive.
33:33I mean, at that time, Home Depot was like maybe what,
33:34seven minutes, five minutes from the house.
33:37And the Lord started off with the gentle, you know?
33:43You express your desire to have one on one time
33:46with your children, you know?
33:48This is a godly desire.
33:49This is a good thing.
33:50This is something you need.
33:51This is something you should want.
33:54And you asked me to help you to identify opportunities
33:58because what you didn't know, I asked the Lord,
34:00Lord, help me to find places in my day,
34:03those that are pre-planned,
34:04and even those that are not planned,
34:06where I can have those one-on-one moments, you know?
34:09Because as we say, you might have heard us say this before,
34:11we've learned that quantity of time with our children
34:14gives rise to quality time.
34:15That you can't pre-program, pre-program
34:18these poignant moments.
34:19So all of this is in the back of my mind,
34:20and the Lord is ministering to me.
34:22Now these are the things that you said,
34:24these are right, these are good.
34:26And then He comes in with the boom.
34:28And your wife, she was right,
34:31when she pointed out to you that this was a moment.
34:36And this is a moment that you missed.
34:41But because God is gracious as he is,
34:45he convicted me in that moment.
34:46And I repented of just missing that.
34:50And in spite of, and it helped me to recognize
34:53when my wife said that she wasn't just expressing
34:54her desire as a person, she was the Lord's vessel
34:58in that moment to help me, to answer a prayer
35:01that I had offered to the Lord.
35:03but because I was so consumed
35:05and what I had already programmed in my mind
35:07that I wanted to get done, I missed it in that moment.
35:10So when I got home, I was convicted
35:13and I expressed that conviction
35:16because I've learned a long time ago
35:17that when you miss it, your repentance should be as broad
35:20as the scope of the impact of your missing.
35:22And so I wanted to let my wife know that she was right
35:27and that the Lord was ministering to me through her.
35:30And because I was not in that moment in tune
35:33what the spirit of God was trying to do for me.
35:34I missed that moment.
35:36So when I got home, I had nothing but contrition
35:40and expression of repentance
35:42and really asking my wife to forgive me
35:43for not listening to her in that moment.
35:45I think it's important that we always understand
35:48that the purpose of those moments is for us to grow.
35:54It's not for me to nag you, it's not for me to convince you
35:57that I'm right, it's not for us to win arguments,
35:59not for you to tell me that I'm wrong or that I'm nagging.
36:02It's none of those things.
36:03I think we so get down into our flesh
36:05and we allow our flesh to a rule and reign
36:07in every interaction that it becomes such a difficult
36:11and unpleasant experience to be married.
36:13And so if we just change our mind and we ask the Lord,
36:17Lord help me to be better.
36:19So I have another anecdote if you don't mind me sharing.
36:21Yeah, what I wanted to ask you a question though
36:22before you moved on from there,
36:26having that experience with me,
36:28I wanted to ask you was how did that impact you in the moment and what type of efficacy
36:37did that encounter have in terms of your position and our marriage going forward from there?
36:42Yeah, that's good.
36:43So the first thing was that I saw the work of God, like God working, I saw that he's trustworthy.
36:49So when he tells me be quiet and don't say anything when he gets back and don't let him
36:53know how angry you are and all that, trust me.
36:56I saw him literally work, right?
36:59And so when he convicted you, I was like, oh, Lord.
37:01So here I am fuming, think I need to tell him something
37:03and you're literally working at the same time in him.
37:07And so he comes back and we're good.
37:09And another thing that helped me at that point
37:12was realize that we don't have to argue.
37:14Like we don't have to fight.
37:15So that's how I contributed to our longevity.
37:17Going forward, it's we don't have to fight.
37:20We don't have to fight.
37:21I don't have to let him know how angry I am
37:24and what he's doing and just going off
37:26And likewise, we don't have to do that with me.
37:28If there's a disagreement, there's a disagreement.
37:30Like in reality, we have disagreements, right?
37:32With two different people, different perspectives,
37:34there's disagreements.
37:34But we can respectfully voice our disagreements,
37:37voice our concerns, respectfully understand
37:42that there even the purpose of us bringing up the disagreements
37:45or our perspectives is so that we can grow,
37:49so that we can grow together and so we can honor God.
37:51So it's never an attack.
37:53And I'm not saying we're perfect, y'all.
37:54I'm just saying that the Lord has opened our eyes
37:56to this reality and we pray consistently
38:00and continually that we do this
38:01so that he can be glorified in our marriage.
38:03And so it's always trying to find the way of like,
38:06to edify and to gently correct.
38:10And I can say the thing because it goes alongside
38:12what we're talking about right now.
38:13So I have grown up being a corner cutter.
38:16Like that's just, I feel like I don't wanna say this
38:19in my DNA cause that's just, well, I guess it is
38:21because of sin, but I'm a new creature.
38:23So I've endeavored to ask God continually
38:27to remove that from me, because it's so ungodly
38:30to try to get from point A to point B the fastest way,
38:33the quickest way without seeking Him for direction.
38:36And without taking time to be thorough at things
38:39and to glorify Him even if it's diligent,
38:42even if it's harder, you know, and so now at home,
38:44I always tell the kids, we don't do what is easy,
38:46we do what is right.
38:47So we don't want to train and raise corner cutters by default.
38:51Like I'm trying to be intentional
38:52because that happened to me.
38:53So I've struggled with that.
38:56So Abe, because he's very different in that.
38:59And I know you got has ministered to you through that
39:02and has grown you in that.
39:04You are very thorough and you're very diligent.
39:06And so you try to make sure that you cover all your bases.
39:10And so I would always reject that
39:12because I would always say, man, that's just you.
39:14Like you're type A over there.
39:15Go ahead with your type A.
39:16I'm gonna be over here with my free whatever.
39:19And I honestly, it was just recently
39:22that I realize I'm not dependable
39:26because of the corner cutting
39:27and because of the like of thoroughness.
39:29And so it really convicted me.
39:31So it's many adding notes if you will,
39:35but I'm gonna condense it to like the,
39:37what I'm trying to say is that we would have conversations
39:40like make the grocery list, right?
39:42Like it was my job to make two groceries, right?
39:44And so I'm going through everything
39:45and I would always forget one or two things.
39:47And it would be so irritating because it would ever take me,
39:50but then also it would take you
39:51you're like, I don't understand why you can't be thorough.
39:53And, or he would tell me, hey, can you, you know, make sure that this is done, you know,
39:58at home or whatever, because if he would need it for whatever, things like that.
40:01And then I would say in my mind, yes, I'm going to do that.
40:03And then I would forget and not do it.
40:05So then it becomes a thing where again, he's being sanctified.
40:08So he's not yelling at me about it.
40:09He's not going off on me.
40:10But he's just really being patient.
40:13And then it came to the point, like it came to a head where you were like, I don't think
40:17you said it, but I just knew it.
40:19that it was like, I'm just not dependable in my marriage.
40:22Like Abe could not count on me.
40:24He could not count on me.
40:25And it tore me apart y'all
40:27cause I'm like, I'm supposed to be a helper.
40:28I was, you know, we're trying to honor God.
40:30And he could not count on me.
40:31Like he would, and you could share this
40:33probably better than I do.
40:34But he would be like, okay, I'm gonna tell her
40:36that I need this, but then I might like come around the back
40:39and make sure that it's done.
40:40Y'all are horrible.
40:41So again, being sanctified, I could have it that moment
40:44and be like, man, you, first of all, let me,
40:46you don't you understand my plate?
40:48Like I got six kids,
40:49don't you understand I'm homeschooling them,
40:50you know, I could come up with all the excuses
40:52as to why I forget why I can't do it right,
40:54you know, all the excuses.
40:56But in reality, if I wanna honor God
40:59and my character is not godly in that area,
41:03we gotta attack that, I gotta attack that.
41:05And so I praise God that you didn't come at me
41:07from this place of like,
41:09you're just, you know, doing this wrong or whatever.
41:11It was from a place of like, listen, I'm even patient,
41:13but like, I need to be able to count on you.
41:15And so I repented y'all and I asked the Lord in tears,
41:20like, Lord, help me to be accountable first to you.
41:22I just wanna honor you.
41:24I want my character to be like yours.
41:25I wanna be refined.
41:27I wanna be purified.
41:28I wanna be diligent.
41:30I wanna be trustworthy because it glorifies you.
41:33Not because I wanna be a good wife to ape,
41:35nor because I wanna be like ape,
41:37because let me tell you, I could never do that, all right?
41:39Like I cannot be him and he cannot be me.
41:42But the fact that you were patient helped me
41:45to be able to get to the place where I realized,
41:47okay, this is a character issue.
41:49It is not an abysm or, you know, like,
41:52it is a character issue that I must submit to God.
41:56And so when I did that, I started seeing,
41:59like I just had my planner here,
42:00I started seeing that I needed tools,
42:04I needed tools to be more kind of,
42:06and a sister in Christ, my dear friend helped me with that.
42:08She was like, listen, I know that you and your nature
42:11don't like to check lists or planners,
42:14and I didn't, y'all, I cringe,
42:15to think of those things.
42:16But she told me, she said,
42:18consider asking a what tools he uses
42:23to keep him responsible and diligent
42:25and keep him on track.
42:27Because he's also shuffling a lot of things, you know.
42:30What is that he uses?
42:30And so I asked him,
42:32in all my humility,
42:33it took all the humility in the world.
42:35I was like, Lord,
42:36can I just interject briefly before we get to this point?
42:38Because let me tell you,
42:40and because you brought it up,
42:41I want to bring this up.
42:42You brought it up.
42:43For the longest in our marriage,
42:44she would reduce my efforts at being diligent and thorough.
42:49She would even call me.
42:50You're just an eye-daughter and a tea-crosser.
42:52She would reduce those efforts to just being abysms.
42:55As opposed to being instances of godly character.
42:59And so what you're explaining is that the Lord
43:02helped you to see, well, wait a minute, no,
43:03these are not just things that are indicative of who
43:08Abe is, because I can tell you all, before the Lord,
43:11that wasn't the case.
43:12the Lord has grown me in these ways to help me to be more diligent and more thorough.
43:18And so, but I love you and I married to you. So it wasn't as if I'm going to allow this revelation
43:25of a particular character issue to cause me to change my disposition toward you. I continue to pray
43:30and I endeavor to be consistent in my love for you that I never, and my God's grace, man, this is the
43:34truth. We don't have these blow-ups to where we are, we know blowing fire breathing, dragging,
43:40even when you corrected me about bringing Christian with me to the store, that we never
43:46got to the place where we were huffing and puffing and blowing each other's houses down.
43:49But we're able to still speak gently and in love because you're my sister in Christ, you
43:53are the daughter of the Lord in addition to being my wife.
43:56So I want to treat you the way that God would have me to treat you.
43:59But in this front, it's true over years that you diminish this aspect of my striving
44:08to be God in these ways and just being what that's just how you are and I'm a
44:11YouTube say I'm a free bird let me be free let me be free don't come over here
44:14all your list I don't have to write that down I don't have a planner I don't
44:17hear none of that because I'm not you I'm not you and I'm just like I ain't trying
44:20to make you to be me but I'm just saying if we need eggs we need eggs right that's
44:25right if we might go into the grocery store what's the point of going to the
44:28grocery store and coming home and having to go back to the grocery store
44:31and I'm gonna say that's all I want to enter into yeah it's true y'all and with
44:37with all the humility, I said,
44:38I'm sorry, because I've been 15 years of me,
44:41just community-reading-less.
44:43I said, what tools do you use?
44:44And so he helped me come up with some tools,
44:46and now I'm like using the tools,
44:48and I'm better, I'm better.
44:50You are. You are.
44:51But it is a man, it is a work,
44:55and that's why I wanna distinguish hard work from a work.
44:58When God works in us, it is good.
45:01Does it feel great at times?
45:02No, but Lord, I rejoice that he doesn't leave me the same.
45:06Like I rejoice, like the scripture says, rejoice.
45:09Like I want to honor him.
45:13I am, I have so many things about me.
45:16And I feel like everybody can relate here.
45:18We have so many things about ourselves
45:19that are just learned behaviors that are ungodly,
45:24but it's just the way we are and the way we've operated
45:26and the way we, and so we are stuck there.
45:28And we just use this as an excuse, you know,
45:31like this is how I am who I am.
45:32Man, the Lord came to make you new.
45:35You are a new creature in Christ.
45:36He died on the cross already for you.
45:39So the least we can do is give him our all.
45:42So when there are areas of ungodliness,
45:45when there are areas where man,
45:47we're not being a bright light the way we should be.
45:51Lord, cleanse me, man, purify me, remove it from me.
45:54And if it takes my husband to tell me,
45:56and if it takes whoever,
45:59Lord, help me to have humility to receive
46:01and not just come back defensively,
46:03which we have done, right?
46:05The flesh just wants to be like, hold up.
46:07But man, the Holy Spirit convicts,
46:09and I pray that we would in that moment
46:11receive that conviction and then say, okay, you're right.
46:13Like what you're highlighting in me
46:15is something I need to work on.
46:16And vice versa, when I'm highlighting something new,
46:18you're receptive.
46:19Lord, help me to be godly.
46:21So you can be honored and glorified.
46:22That's the bottom line.
46:23Amen.
46:24It never becomes an attack.
46:25Amen.
46:26And the thing is people sometimes misconstrued something.
46:29It is true that Christ following doesn't result in Him
46:32wanted to change our personalities.
46:37But Christ following does with the Christ
46:39wanted to strip us from ungodliness.
46:42We need to be able to distinguish whether or not
46:45the issue that we have is merely a personality issue
46:48or if it's an issue of ungodliness, an issue of sin.
46:52Because Christ came to conform our character to Christ's
46:57to his.
46:58He came, lived, and died and was resurrected.
47:00The baby's crying, plus you got to stink and die,
47:01after the show, or we can go change some diapers.
47:03But Christ came to conform us to His image.
47:07And so, what we need to be able to identify
47:10and to be honest about is whether or not
47:12this is merely a personality quirk,
47:14or is this an issue of godliness or ungodliness?
47:18And of the humility, the integrity,
47:20and the honesty about ourselves to say,
47:22Lord, this is true.
47:24This is something that is ungodly,
47:26and I'm asking you to excise it from me
47:29in order to make me more like you guys.
47:32This is what our Lord does in marriage.
47:34He carries a cutter, but it's not a butcher's blade.
47:37It's a scalpel for healing.
47:42The views and opinions expressed in this broadcast
47:44may not necessarily reflect those
47:46of the American Family Association or American Family Radio.

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